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Thursday, June 05, 2008 | 11:01 am
Finally, FINALLY, I am able to bring myself to blog. Back to the community that I deeply embrace:) The place that made me the person I am now..
It seems life's accelerating fast now that certain things have to be left untouched and untouched it would be forever. Lots of friendship were forged, lots more broken, stitch up between cries, laughters and tears. One moment the joy was focused on something I thought held meaning, such as the CCAC Camp and the Jogathon, but the next moment, all were gone. I want to reminisce everything, I want everything to count but sometimes, inevitably, things got lost along the way.
50 years down the road, what do we remember of our days when we were all young? When we all discover what life had installed for us. The littlest things that we find joy in, the conversations we used to have, the photographs we capture.    Do we remember the choices we made that impacted the path life we will take? Do we remember the friendships forged and lost along the way? If they all matter, will we remember them all?
When CCAC came to mind, I can only think of a few photographic memories etched deeply in my mind. All the same, I know CCAC had been there for me and I don't want to forget. But will photographs ever replace that feelings we used to have?
Flipping through the webpage of Estee's photobucket album, peppered with photographs, color and greyscale, I see all the smiles of the people I love and would regard as my loved ones forever.
Captured forever are the smiles, the youth, the radiance and especially the togetherness; the connectivity that still binds us today. Binding us forever in each frame brilliantly-taken photo with love.
It's no wonder that our moods are always at cloud nine, always at our best, because never will we take a photo of a moment of sadness, anguish and pain. But then, this meant that photographs aren't stories of our lives. They are stories, chapters of our happiness.
But as time passes, we live what we called life and go about toiling, persevering, long forgetting about those memories that were left behind in smooth paperbacks, frozen in time.
Did we take a photo so that we can remember the happiness? Did we take them so that we can look back on all those beautiful emotions? Or did we take them, as an excuse to tell ourselves that we did enjoy life, and so the hardship is worth it?
When I looked back at all those photos, the word nostalgic came to my mind. The nostalgia wasn't just from friendship. It was really family. After our seniors step down and later graduate, the whole lot of us all seemed to grow more sensitive, like the fabric of life grew alittle less, alittle more fragile. I knew I felt that way, and when I looked at the photos, some of it with them inside, ever-so loud and crazy and uber-hyper, never would I thought that we will go on our separate ways. I felt funny, a burning sensation of wanting to go back to the past.    50 years down the road, I want to be able to tell my grandson how life has shone on me like how it will shine on you. How friends will come and go but the memories will always last:)
But right now where I am, let me cherish those times I have, the journeys with you guys give me faith. That even though CCAC seems aeons ago, it is this little community that encompasses my soul, that had successfully moulded me into a better person before my previous fullest self.
It awes me to realise that sometimes I am confused with the amount of time we are given. Sometimes its incredibly fast and you can't get enough. But when you look back into the past, it seems aeons away when it is only a few months of my age since the last Jogathon event.
Nonetheless, the smiles are always there.. 
When life gets so tough, some people goes back to looking at photographs, but wouldn't that make it all the more sadder? To know that what's once present is now no longer existent. To know that those happiness, those youth will never be the same again? *Ahahaxx..    But looking at such photos, it really doesn't fail to make you smile. I know I did and a genuine smile that is near extinct now in this world. Even if it meant looking at someone you don't quite know but he is actually a part of you really who once share laughters of table jokes with you.
If you got the time, look back once more. Immerse yourself in forgotten memories, for they will surely bring you further. For those smiles and laughters are priceless beyond anything we can ever get:)
"Waah.. Bloody long.. And this time no cheem please:) On behalf of the sec 4 CCAC members, here's a tetchy entry from my own little cranium. Hope you people like it:) I've put my blood and sweat into it.. Whoah.. *Ahahaxx And, as you guys know, in fact it has long been foretold, that we have step down so I would like to take this opportunity to kneel on my knees and cry, to beg for forgiveness in the event that we accidently or purposely bully you guys.. Muahahaxx.." "If by mistake we've made a mistake, then please regard it as a mistake and forget it. But only forget the mistake. Even by mistake, never forget us.." With warm Love, Elfie:)
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